February is a difficult month for me. It always has and always will be. You see, 10 years ago, when I was just 17, my best friend had his life taken by a reckless and senseless drunk driver. Just typing that gives me a pain in my heart. Dallas, was only 17 years old when that man took his life by climbing behind the wheel of his car drunk. Dallas was quite possibly the best man I knew. He was bright, spirited, intelligent, happy-go-lucky. He was one of those people you wanted to be around. And, he was mine. He was my Dallas. I was his. It was as simple as that. There isn’t a single day that passes that I don’t think of him. He’s always on my mind, but February is definitely more difficult than the other 11 months out of the year. I always think about what I could have done to change things. To make him stay just a little longer. To hold him back. Anything to make his path and the drunk driver never cross. I wish I could go back in time and change things, but I can’t. Right now, just typing this I have to pause just to breathe. It’s so difficult. I can’t imagine what’d he’d look like at 27. I can’t picture how much of a better man he would be. And, that hurts.
For years, I have played with the idea, Going Through Hell. A story of a young woman, Noelle, who loses Landon, the love of her life and best friend at just 17. Yes, he’s very much based on Dallas. But, because the pain of losing Dallas is so very real to me, it’s been difficult to finish it. This year, I vow, that I will complete Going Through Hell. I will complete it and release it as special tribute to Dallas. No, I can’t bring him back, but I can keep his memory alive.
And, please, take the keys of anyone drinking. Stand up and be a designated driver. Don’t let someone possibly cause the pain that myself and Dallas’s family have lived with for the past 10 years. Taking the keys or being a sober driver is far easier than burying someone who you love to the ends of the earth and back.
Dallas…this one’s for you. I love you and I miss you. ♥